Spearhead: Positive

Make me, make me sweat
til I'm wet, til I'm dry
but then wipe this tear from my eye
haven't felt this warm in a long time
even out in the bright sunshine
in lifetime of springtimes

I fall into your arms
with my heart pumpin' on
like a bubblin' dub track
like a garlicy hot tonque and lip smack

I did some contemplation
before we got down to this consecration
maybe baby something in you kiss said
it was an impetous
for me to rethink this

If I love you
then I better get tested
make sure we're protected

I walk through the park
dressed like a question mark
Hark!
I hear my memory bark
in the back of my brain,
makn' me insane...
...like cocaine
[chorus]
But how'm I gonna live my life if I'm positive?
Is it gonna be a negative?
How'm I gonna live my life if I'm positive?
Is it gonna be a negative?
but how'm I gonna live my life if I'm positive?

It dawned on me, it seemed to me
this is unusual scenery
this red light greenery
make me feel kinda dreamery
thinkin' how I used to be

Arrive at the clinic
walk through the front door
take a nervous number
then I think about it more
about all the time
that I neglected
makin sure that
I was protected

They took my blood
With an anonymous number
two weeks waitin' wonderin'

I shoulda done this a long time ago
alot of excuses why I couldn't go
I know these things and these things I must know
'cause it's better to know than to not know!

[chorus]

I go home to kick it
in my apartment
I try to give myself
a risk assessment
the wait is what can really annoy ya
everyday is more paranoya

I'm readin' about how it's transmitted
some behavior I must admit it
who I slept with, who they slept with,
who they, who they, who they slept with

I think about life and immortality
what's the first thing I do if I'm H.I.V
have a cry and tell my mother
get on the phone and call my past lovers
I never thought about infectin' anotha
all the times that I said "Hmmm? Don't bother."

Was it really all that magic?
The times I didn't use a prophalactic

Would my whole life have to change?
or would my whole life remain the same?
sometimes it makes me wanna shout!
all these things too hard to think about
a day to laugh, a day to cry
a day to live and a day to die
'til I find out, I may wonder
but I'm not gonna live my life six feet under

[chorus]