Steve Vai: The Audience Is Listening

Now stevie, now don't be nervous, honey, o.k.? I'm gonna go in & i'm
Gonna introduce you & then you're gonna come in with your guitar & you're
Gonna play that nice, nice music you were telling me about; & while you're
Doing that, I'll be sitting in the back of the. we'll have such a good time,
So don't you be nervous, honey. it will relaw everybody, & we'll be so happy.
I'm gonna go n now. I'll introduce you, o.k.? heads up! now you kids you,
All of you, calm down. that's good, o.k. everyone in your own seat, that's
Good. o.k., now, little stevie vai is going to play a composition on the
Guitar. he wrote it all by himself. o.k., stevie, bring your three friends
Up, they can play with you. that seve vai, what a nice little boy. {i wrote
This song for all my friends. when I grow up, I'm gonna be a famous rock
'n roll guitar player.} love it. eh, he, he, go ahead. {and this is my
Whammy bar. and it's gonna be loud.} don't you think that's a bit loud?
Boys!!! it's getting too loud! you're getting out of control, boys. stevie,
Now calm down class, calm down. mr. vai, you've got to turn it down...
{what did you say, you want me to turn it down? you mean down like this...}
(boys, what happened to that nice music? ) that sounds like noise mr. vai.
And I want it stopped! you've all got detention. {uh, oh, here comes
Trouble.} ayy. vai, are you outta your mind? you, guys, ya don't back off.
Ya must be crazy! I'm gonna flip-out. I'm tellin' you. if this is my


Final flip-out, you guys are gonna go with me. {ah, shut up.} will you
Two stop dancing like that. frankie, leave that girl alone! we're not
Gonna have another incident like mildred. come here to me me, vai, don't
You hear me? come here you little snit. wait 'till I get my hands...
Don't you run away. ay, ay, ay, ay, ay, ay, ay, ay vai. knock it off! get
Off my desk! {hey andrea, check this out.} oh, stevie, you promised me
You'd play nice music; people out of control, dancin' on the desks. playin'
With the girls. that awful noise just make people go wild. you gotta turn
That music down, stevie, please. {i'm fearless in my heart. they will
Always see that in my eyes. I am the passion; I am the warfare. I will never
Stop...always constant, accurate, and intense.} mark my words, you'll never
Amount to anything, steve vai. you'll see, you'll be a bum, in the streets.
A bum, that's it, a bum. I thought you were such a nice little boy. ya
Know what? ya mean, ya got a mean, nasty, vicious streak. why don't you
Just quit school? move to california with all those other bums. go, that's
Where you belong, with all those crazies out in california. maybe you'll be
Famous; {thank you very much.} ha! that's the funniest thing I've ever
Heard. {thank you very much.} you-famous? with that noise? ha! i'll
See ya in jail; {thank you very much.} give me a break stevie, stop it.
You'll see, mark my words.