Negativland: Then

GUNS.
("Hey pa!!")
GUNS.
"wilderness.........."
"Hey pa!! LOOK!!!"
GUNS.
Boom!
Bam-ba-ba-bam-bam! Bam-ba-ba-bam-bam!!
GUNS. GUNS.
attractive target.
(RUN, BOY!!!)
attractive target.
Mmmm mmm hmm hmmmmm... the sun is gone.... and all the roses
fall... (RUN, BOY!!!)
GUNS.
*bang*
MAUREEN!!!!!!
*bang* *bang*
GUNS.
*bang* GUNS. GUNS. *bang*
(RUUUUUUUNNNNN!!!!!)
Gee, (GUNS.) there's a real Western story for ya!
(GUNS.)
Gosh, what excitement!
(Quaker Puffed Rice Sparkys....)
GUNS.
Gee...
"Let's
get out of here!"
"Don't move for that door, either of ya!"
(...and Quaker Puffed Wheat Sparkys!)
"That's Hickock's voice!"
"Where is he?"
"I dunno... I can't see nothin'!"
"You don't have to see me, now just settle down,
you two, we're
gonna have a little talk."
We can't stop!
(Quaker Puffed Rice Sparkys, and Quaker Puffed Wheat
Sparkys!)
We can't stop!
"We'll just sit back, and wait."
Can't stop!
(Quaker Puffed Rice Sparkys, and Quaker Puffed Wheat
Sparkys!)
"Stacy and I can wa
it as long as you can."
(We can't stop!)
"Can't we, Stacy?"
(Quaker Puffed Rice Sparkys...)
"Uh... sure we can."
(and Quaker Puffed Wheat Sparkys!)
"Drag out your harmonica, Jingles.... we might
well have a little music, while we're waiting..."
"Harmonica? (Can't stop!) Oh, sure
thing, Bill... somethin' happy!"
GUNS. GUNS. GUNS. GUNS. GUNS. GUNS. GUNS. GUNS. GUNS. GUNS.
GUNS.
Quaker Puffed Rice Sparkys, and Quaker Puffed
Wheat Sparkys!
Those delicious, nutritious
breakfast cereals
... shot from GUNS!
Bam-ba-ba-bam-bam! Bam-ba-ba-bam-bam!!
*bang* *bang*
Yes, shot from GUNS!
(We can't stop! Get up in there...)
"We'll just sit back and wait."
Bursting forth gigantic grains of goodness!
"Anyone shoot, and we give 'em their m
oney's worth! Come on...."
"We'll just sit back and wait."
"Guess you can start on the harmonica now,
Jingles."
(Alright)
"Better put that fancy gun in your hand, you might need it..."
(Alright. Now take my gun...)
"Now we're gonna have th
at talk." (and the
money...)
"See, in this world, there's two kinds of people, my friend. Those
with loaded guns, (Gee) and those who dig. You dig."
"Now, the difference between justice and
murder..."
"Hey, Bill! He's comin' out, I can see his hor
se!"
Gosh, what excitement!
"Go ahead, load up and shoot..."
"I was right there listening, and I just couldn't leave until I
heard both the stories!"
"Time sure flies..."
"Do you only know how to play, or do you know how to shoot?"
"I'm gonna k
ill you with this one bullet if you try to take his
gun.
So... come on, take it, if you can..."
"Hand it over."
"Heh heh heh heh...."
"You'll be dead before you can draw the hammer back!"
"Is that so? *click* *bang*"
(Good shooting. Very good
shooting.)
"Where'd you... get that.... Derringer?"
"Stay back, it holds two shots, now who wants the second
one?"
"Well, you know music... and you can count. (Bravo) All the way up
to 2." (Don't shoot me...)
"Drop your gun..."
"Don't do it! He killed
Sol, but we got 4 guns, and he's
only got one bullet left in that Derringer!"
"One's better than none!"
"We got him"
(Let's see if that's true...)
*click-click*
Count to 3...
(All the way up to 6, if I have
to.)
Don't shoot me...
I may be f
aster than you... (One...)
"When I say 3, draw. One..."
"If you say two, I'll kill you!"
"Keep countin'!"
"Two..."
(Gee!)
"I'll kill the next man who speaks!"
Gosh, what excitement *BANG*
(Fight!)
Hey, wait a minute... (GUNS. GUNS. GUNS. GUNS.
)
Good shooting!
"Oh, don't shoot again, Hickock!"
"That wasn't Bill, that was me, Jingles, and don't break for
that door again!"
Drop it, man....
*bang*
You can have them now, if you like... (GUNS.) Eight dead men can't
talk! (GUNS.) Ha ha haaaa.....
(RUN, BOY!!!) (Here they come...)
GUNS.
(Hee hee hee. I think they liked my joke. Heh heh heh. We
let them go home in a little while... ha ha ha ha)
(RUUUUNNN!!!!)
GUNS.
(Shoot at me, willya?
Jumpin' catfish!)
Drop it, man, bring him down. (G
UNS.) Drop it man, bring him down.
Bring him down. Bring him down. Bring him down....
GUNS.
(RUN, BOY!!!)
GUNS.
(RUUUUNNNNN!!!!!!)
GUNS.
"Hello?"
*bang*
GUNS.
("...fine shootin', just fine, (GUNS.) ya missed him!"
"It was too late! He was blind!"
"Ya crazy-eyed fool!"
"What we gonna do, Sheriff?"
"Start closin' in! I'll come in from this side." (Go on)
GUNS.
*bang* *bang* *bang*
GUNS.
*bang* *bang* *bang* .....
GUNS.
GUNS.
GUNS.
GUNS.
GUNS.......
*BANG*
"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.....
."
"Well, if that doesn't beat all! What's goin' on, anyway? Hickock,
Jingles, Sourdough... all of 'em vanishin' into thin air! There's somethin'
downright weird about this whole thing!"