The Arrogant Worms: The Ballad Of Dan

I'm out on the range, surveying the land
Thinking of the job that's to be done
My life is hard but I don't mind
Men like me, that's how the west was won
I stand the pain and the suffering
For on the trail I am the king
On doors I knock and on bells I ring
Always sure that I will get the sale

'Cause I am Dan the Insurance Salesman
In a beat-up Chevrolet I do ride
I rope them in and tie them up and bind them legally
And on the dotted line I make them sign
Hi-de-hey (Hi-de-hey, hi-de-hey, hi-de-hey) hey!

The door swings wide and I sense my prey
Ready to fall victim to my pitch
I tell him all about the plan
With all of its inherent benefits
If you lose an arm it's a thousand bucks
Lose both of them and get twice as much
And if you should die, well then, bless your luck
You'll just be raking in the cash

'Cause I am Dan the Insurance Salesman
In a beat-up Chevrolet I do ride
I rope them in and tie them up and bind them legally
And on the dotted line I make them sign
Hi-de-hey (Hi-de-hey, hi-de-hey, hi-de-hey) hey!

The sucker signs, the deed is done
It's time for me to get back on the road
A lonely man out on the land
Where the wind can blow so cold
I ride into the setting sun
With the knowledge of a job well done
But I can't rest until everyone
Has become properly insured

'Cause I am Dan the Insurance Salesman
In a beat-up Chevrolet I do ride
I rope them in and tie them up and bind them legally
And on the dotted line I make them sign
Hi-de-hey (Hi-de-hey, hi-de-hey, hi-de-hey) hey!

Yes, I am Dan the Insurance Salesman
In a beat-up Chevrolet I do ride
I rope them in and tie them up and bind them legally
For on the dotted line I make them sign