Barbra Streisand: Blind date

FANNY & CHORUS Smooth the sofa, plump the pillows Dump the ashtrays, oh this dress Look at me I am shaking all over, Shaking all over I'm a mess Waiting wondering what I'll be thinking When he comes walking through that door What'll come walking through that door A man I never saw in my life before Oh, I am so nervous I got a blind date waiting to call on me (any minute now) I got a blind date what am I gonna see (any minute now) Right over there's the doorway, he will be walking through Will he be six foot eight or maybe four foot two (it could happen) I got a blind date waiting to come around (any minute now) Oy but I'm nervous listen to my heart pound Why do I need this headache, single is not a crime I got a blind date An with my luck he'll be on time I got a girlfriend Shirley, who says why not (she's an idiot) This guy is a friend from a friend of a friend she got (hello, how do you do what an idiot) One thing I know is Shirley ain't sitting on no shelf If he was such a vow she'd keep him for herself (it's only natural) She says she is he's nice and he deals in stocks (sounds good, but she's an idiot) I'll bet a buck he looks like month-old lox (also and idiot) What do I need from Shirley her and her fifty cup I got a blind date and I'm praying he stands me up Wait wait, what am I praying he stands me up, I'll stand him up. I smell a rat anyway. Umm. I'm gonna hide under the bed, he'll never see me, he'll walk in and look around, I wouldn't be there, he'll go away and that's the end of that. Perrfect! Now you keep quiet, not a word you hear You didn't see a thing Oeps there he is! Now quiet everybody sssh quiet! Blind date: Rosalie?! Rosalie: Oi, oi, oi Blind date: Rosalie?! that's odd she doesn't seem to be here Rosalie: Smart, smart! Blind date: I've been stood up, it's news Rosalie: Well it's better than put down Blind date: This has never happened before Rosalie: What and ego! Blind date: Rosalie?! Rosalie: Sh, sh, sh! Rosalie: It worked, it worked! He never saw me. Boy am I lucky I didn't see him neither, but I can just imagine what a lox that one was. Rosalie: I got it right her Shirley was playing tricks Voice: No, no, that's wrong, you got it wrong Rosalie: Wait, wait, what that's not right? Voice: No, he was gorgeous he looked like Rudolph Rosalie: Rudolph who? Voice: Rudolph Valentino Rosalie: Get away Voice: Yeah, the sheik from Arabia Rosalie: Not the phantom from the opera? Voice: Uh, Uh Rosalie: The sheik from where? Voice: The sheik from Arabia Rosalie: Get away Voice: That's right Rosalie: Wait a minute is this person kidding me around here? Voice: No, no absolutely Rosalie: Get away Rosalie: Well that's what happened I let him get away What do I'll do now maybe become a nun (That's impossible) I'm calling Shirley maybe she'll bring a gun Please Shirley, even if he's Lon Chaney fat, bald or short or tall Having a blind date is better than having No date, at no time with no one at all. Wait a minute maybe I spoke too soon Shirley get me out of here! Oh this one is cute.