Lazyboy: We only read the headlines

You can cut to the chase And you know its okay Coz we only read the headlines We only read the headlines Baby get to the point And quit the full play We only read the headlines We only read the headlines anyways 54% of bank robberies take place on a Friday Women blink nearly twice as much as men Elvis never ever gave an encore The number of wars fought between countries That both have at least one McDonalds is zero Every 5 minutes an area of rainforest the size of a foot ball field Is eliminatedWomen who read romance novels Have sex twice as often as those who dont Did you know? A can of diet coke will float in water While a can of regular coke will sink The Muppet show was banned from TV in Saudi Arabia Because one of its stars was a pig Males on average think about sex Every 7 seconds More than 50% of the people in the world have never made Or received a telephone call Syphilis has risen 500% in the last six years in London Why is it that everybody seems to get older? Except for Cliff Richard You can cut to the chase And you know its okay Coz we only read the headlines We only read the headlines Baby get to the point And quit the full play We only read the headlines We only read the headlines anyways 1 out of 10 girls under 20 is carrying Chlamydia According to several sources Dr. Harvey Kellogg tried to make a cure for masturbation When he made cornflakes Women are 30% more active during a full moon Indonesia is the country with the highest scout membership In every single episode of Seinfeld Theres a superman in at least one scene somewhere If you weighed all the animals in the world Hens would be 10% of the total weight In Minnesota theres a law That prevents men from having sex with living fish Jimmy Carter can read 2000 words per minute Humans and dolphins are the only species That has sex for pleasure Danny deVito is taller than Dolly Parton You can cut to the chase And you know its okay Coz we only read the headlines We only read the headlines In the papers on the news Heavens heard theres no excuse In formations everywhere All you need to know is right here Its possible to attend your own funeral Because the human brain continues to send out electrical wave signals For up to 37hours following death We only read the headlines We only read the headlines We only read the headlines You can cut to the chase And you know its okay Coz we only read the headlines We only read the headlines Baby get to the point And quit the full play We only read the headlines We only read the headlines anyways