Me Without You: Carousels

On a bus ride into town
I wondered out loud "Why am I going to town?"
And as I looked around at the billboards and the stores
I thought "Why do I look around?"
And I kissed the filthy ground
And in the first dry spot I found
And I didn't have to wonder why I was laying down.

Before long I was too cold
Took a bus back to the station
I found a letter left by a pay phone
With no return contact
And it read like a horn blown by some sad angel
"Bunny, it was me... it was me who let you down"
It was the shyest attempt I'd ever seen at conversation

If I didn't have You as my guide I'd still wander lost in Sinai,
Counting the plates of cars from out-of-state,
(how I could jump in their path as they hurry along!)
You surround me, you're pretty but you're all I can see,
like a thick fog - if there was no way into God,
I would never have laid in this grave of a body for so long.

And Bonner fair always came through the first week of September
But it's already the 19th
And there's no sign of it.
Yet I have a hard time
Remembering all the things that I should remember
And a hard time
Forgetting the all things that I am supposed forget.

Oh Christ when You're ready to come back
I think I'm ready for You to come back
But if You want to stay wherever exactly it is You are,
That's okay too - it's really none of my business.
If I didn't have You as my guide I'd still be wandering lost in Sinai
Or down by the tracks watching trains go by to remind me:
There are places that aren't here.
I had a well but all the water left
So I'll ask Your forgiveness with every breath,
If there was no way into God,
I would never have laid in this grave of a body for so long, dear.