Stephen Lynch - For The Ladies

I kissed you on the cheek, "Goodnight my love" I say
You turned to me and smiled "A baby's on the way"
And then you drift asleep to dream of life anew,
And I lie wondering just what I should I do...

I could kick you in the stomach and catch you unawares,
I could swear to god you accidentally fell that flight of stairs,
When I tell you that I love you I will look you in the eye,
As I slowly slide the hanger up your thigh...