Tech N9ne - Suicide Letters

(1st Verse)
Picture me
In a casket
Blasted
Never nobody
Knew how long
The pain lasted
Keep my eyes tight
I'm frightened
But I fights like Tyson
When playin' this game of life
I'm losing
Longing to be enlightened
Absorb my mind state
Reduce the crime rate
And take me out
When running toward the Lord
I see 'em fake me
Out shook me
So from church I play hookie
Listen to the words of a brother
The sick stutters
So you better better
Get the get the bags ready
Comes a killer killer
Like Skagnetti
My brains contaminated
Hella rotten
Wasn't me that killed you
Who was it what was it
The effects of the mildew
My brain's wilted
In my eyes the world is a bit tilted
Lord take me away
Before somebody else gets killed
Blood spilled
Seriously
This is the letter to my homies
I'll be missin'
God told me to behold a pale horse
But I didn't listen
It's hard man
My life is scarred man
I'm losing my mind
So now it's time
Sincerely sign
N9NE

(Chorus)
I just wanna die
I don't want to wake up
I don't wanna cuz
That's the way that I feel
I'm barely hanging on
I don't want to wake up
I don't wanna cuz
That's the way it has to be
(repeat 2x)

(2nd Verse)
I made your life a living hell
With my infidelity
Remember your telling me
All I give a damn about
Is weed stems and melodies
Remember you
Spent 30 minutes in the hospital parking lot
Crying
When the blood test read
The baby of another woman was mine
99.99
You should've left
Along time ago like Mary J. say
Just let it go like Ray J.
I know your mamma heard
You yelling mayday
Spent my life trying to R-A to the P
You sick of me
Always bein' B to the R-O-K to the E
Now there's nothin'
Else left of me
I was a bum
But you still wanted some
Through the rain, snow and thunder
Foul ups , bleeps and blunders
But no man shall tear asunder
Is what you said
You should've put multi bullets
In my head
When you found that evil
Instinct was a song
Where the events actually went on
This is the letter
To my homie, my friend
Who put up with me for 8
So now to take me
Really quickly is my fate
I'm sorry
For making it hard
I know your scarred
I'm losing my mind
So now it's time
Sincerely sign
N9ne

(Chorus)
I just want to die
I don't want to wake up
I don't wanna cuz
That's the way that I feel
I'm barely hanging on
I don't want to wake up
I don't wanna cuz
That's the way it has to be
(repeat 2x)

(3rd Verse)
I love ya'll
The dynamic duo, my babies
It ain't your fault
That your daddy's crazy
Donny,
I miss your drumming like me
One day you'll be ruling
Leelee,
I miss you in my face
Yellin'
Daddy, what you doin'
You two are the reason
Why I'm still standing today
But I'm 1600 miles away
And you get my heart sinkin'
When I start thinkin' about you babies
I heavily start drinkin'
On a daily puffin'
I'm seeing my heart
I gots to toughin'
Can't see me leavin' my angels with nothin'
So I keep bussin
Use my pain for you two
I've gotta come up in the game
Fly planes to an island
So one day you can do the same with yours
Love you galore
And I ain't playin'
makin' me put an end
To this suicidal mind state sayin'

(chorus)
I don't want to wake up
I don't wanna cuz
That's the way I feel
I'm barely hanging on
I don't want to wake up
I don't wanna cuz
That's the way it has to be
(repeat 2x)